Last year when I wanted a 2 seater sports car I very quickly decided on a mx5 my. Join the club I thought, they meet not to far from me just outside Norwich. Although some of the people I met that night were friendly the overall feeling was of a cliquey inner circle, especially with the woman in charge staring at you across the room.
I didn’t go back but kept an eye on the forum and the Norfolk Facebook page in case I wanted to give it another go. But that won’t be happening now. I went to have a look on the Facebook page and found I’ve been thrown off.
The other day someone else had a similar experience and said so on the page so I just put what I’ve said above, no nastyness or swearing just my view. I assume that is why I can no longer get on the Norfolk Facebook page, if that’s the reason I’m glad I didn’t pay the £40 membership fee.
The thing that really takes the biscuit is one of the administrators on there (ClaireTink) saying to the other person ‘if you don’t like it just leave’.
Whoa! Not good buddy! I joined Cheshire n North Wales & they are mega friendly! No cliques just a bunch of people who love their 5’s. Is there another group near you? Administrator please look into this, we should be welcoming new members with open arms! Cheers. Russ
Sadly the “clique” mentality does permeate any number of clubs. Can’t say anything about this club as I am not able to get to club meets. But I have experienced it when intending to join a camera club some years ago, very elitist, if you didn’t own a Leica you were frozen out. Would it be possible for you to try a different OC area, if so it might be worth a try. Good luck whatever you decide to do, however it’s hardly a good recommendation for the club if that “closed shop” mentality is common.
Unfortuneatly this happens a lot and you get, 1 the car must be original , 2 got to be the latest model with all " life style " extras, 3 you have to track day it ,4 we only use it 3 times a year if the or weather is perfect,5 we only go on runs out if the right people are there and we have high tea, or we don’t speak to strangers ,thank you ,I have met them all in the past and hate it but I just keep plodding along in my own way some times being a real pain in the bum but mainly if I can help some one I will
Sorry to here about your experience on joining .,best you move down the country as in my opinion south central Solent ,west London and wessex are very welcoming
I am french registeredin differentMX5club France- England -Russia- Spain - Italy… in each club,as in life,there arenotinteresting people(to be polite, lol) … butthere ismuch morefriendly we are preparinga big partyaround theMX-5next year
Gotta say the Solent crowd were very welcoming and friendly. Is there another region near that you could join in with? Sad to hear you experienced an unfriendly attitude from everyone - you are unlucky as all the OC members I have met have been a good laugh.
Costs nothing to join the forum and 99% on here are really friendly and helpful. Sometimes the odd disagreement but that’s bound to happen. Think we ought to have an ‘online’ region.
Sad story. I’ve been an OC member since 2004; never been to a meet, never been on a “run” but most of the club members I’ve met at National rallies & race meetings etc have been friendly. There are some small minded folk who think they are better than everyone else but Please don’t give up on the club, there are a lot good friendly faces out there
Sorry to hear of your experience. Most of us join clubs to meet like minded people - not to live in each others pockets but compromise on both sides to find common ground. I think one reaches an age where instinct soon tells you when this simply isn’t possible.
I am in South Devon and have not been bothered to go and meet the local club - entirely my bad as the regular newsletter arrives regardless of my lacklustre social effort. Clearly these are enthusiastic, genuine people who would give any new member a hearty welcome. When I finally get round to it, I look forward to meeting Murray and Anette Cowen.
Unless your name is Groucho Marks(I wouldn’t join any club that would have me as a member), please try another venue and hopefully experience a more open minded group.
I’ve already spoken the the AC in Norfolk. I haven’t spoken to Snapon38, quite simply because I haven’t been approached by whomever that is. It’s never a good idea to wash ones laundry in public. If the lady or gent would like to get in touch I’m happy to discuss their issues.
I obviously won’t comment publicly on this particular case. That would be improper. But let me impart the following -
Visiting your first meeting of a group can be quite intimidating. It should not be underestimated how hard it can sometimes be. You are walking into an established group of people who already know each other. I have several ‘rules of thumb’ for anyone new to this experience.
“Third time is the charm” - It takes three visits to a ‘group’ before you can even start to say you have started to get the lay of the land. Don’t expect to be an integral part of the group after one visit. If after three visits it’s really not for you. Then you have given it a fair crack. If you feel a bit out of your depth the first three times don’t worry. Don’t be so hard on yourself, these things take time!
“Output is directly proportional to input” - A group doesn’t owe you conversation, admiration, attention, or dinner. You have to ‘get involved’. Don’t stand alone in a corner and then complain that no one ‘made an effort’. Also, see above, it takes time to integrate into a group. You might feel a bit of an ‘outsider’ the first time. But give it three visits and the give relationship time to bloom. Remember, they don’t know you either. They might think you are a bit ‘unusual’ too, give a little and let them get to know you. Tag into conversations, interject where appropriate. Or just stand and nod along and get to know who is who.
“Text on screen can sometimes sound mean” - This cuts both ways. As officers of the club the AC’s have to be very conscious of what and how they present text based communications online. It has never been my experience that an AC would ever set out to be mean. Remember that attitude is the minds paintbrush. It can colour any text you read. Conversely what you write can also be open to interpretation. If anyone attends a meet and has a ‘problem’. I would advise them to return and have a quiet word with the AC. Going home and posting public, negative, comments on the groups public forum/facebook isn’t likely to get you a positive reaction. Especially if they don’t know who you are. Humans are pack animals despite their best efforts and a billion years of evolution. Poke a group and they will ‘close ranks’. These people are volunteering their time to try to make you happy. Before you hit ‘send’ on your public post. Stop and think about how it will be received and what positive improvement posting it could cause. If you can’t think of any, then why are you really posting it?
“Not every peg fits the hole” - Sometimes it’s just not going to work. At the end of the day we are just a bunch of random strangers who like the same car. We are from different backgrounds, countries, races, religions, upbringings, political camps. We’re not going to necessarily ‘mesh’ with every group we meet. There are 6500+ members in our club. You don’t have to love them all like brothers.
“Spread the wealth” - Your geographical location isn’t related in anything other than distance to your local group. I know of members based in Buckinghamshire that attend meets in West Midlands. Simply because they really get on well with that area. It’s not a problem, no one loses sleep, we are one big club. You are NOT tied to one local area group. A member of the OC is a member of a huge national organisation that is represented by many local interest groups. You are under NO obligation to “Swear Allegiance” to one local area. You can visit any area meet in any area. Wherever, whenever, you want to.
On the subject of paying for membership… or not… There are some important points I should like to make about that. Paying your membership does not directly fund your local area. So why be a member? Your membership entitles you to participation in Spring Nationals, The main National event, Weekends such as the Blyton weekend, Access to free motorsport tickets, Access to a whole range of member benefits and discounts, Access to cheaper car insurance, An award wining club magazine… The list goes on and on. Membership has many benefits. A large percentage of our members never interact at a local level. It’s just not their bag. But they still join up and they still get great value from their membership.
Apologies for perhaps dragging this ‘off topic’ a little. Hopefully my comments are ‘related’ and may be of some use. Again, my door is always open if anyone has an issue they would like to discuss. I hope that Snapon38 can see from the positive replies that the club is, as an entity, quite welcoming for such a big organisation. Perhaps that will be the positive that will come from this.
I shan’t kick this one about further. So I will bow out of this thread now. I’ll be at JAPFEST! at the weekend. Maybe I will bump into some of you there, Just come look for the rotund beardy bloke getting stressed about parking 40 cars in straight lines.
I agree with all of the comments by Cerberus. when I Joined the Club some years ago I felt very much left out BUT decided to keep trying, And it worked. I think We are one of the Friendliest areas there is, but I find new Members do(Understandingly) sit on there own and don’t join in. It is up to Both Parties to show an air of Friendliness and be prepared to give it more than one visit. One way of getting to know people is by Talking so ask Questions, Even if you already know the answers, Acting dumb Often brings out the best in Folks whose instinct is to help answer the Questions. This breaks the ice and helps both parties to get to know each other
Its very interesting as I saw all of this happening on facebook at the time and I saw your comment on the facebook monthly meeting event. It looked to me like it was a fake facebook account that was set up to deliberately cast a negative viewpoint on the group, rather than a genuine account to discuss the issue you faced.
At the time I even commented on the discussion saying it looked like a fake account as did many other members that also shared their stories of being welcomed to the Norfolk Fives, some have been members for years, some have been members for a few months, every single month I meet more and more new members.
All I can say it that your experience is not the normal for the Norfolk Fives, I joined last year after buying my first Five, I went to a couple of monthly meetings and it was the first event (a drive out and a picnic) that I really got to know people. It takes a couple of times to build relationships and meet new friends, there are anywhere up to and above 50 cars at each monthly meeting and even though I have been there a year and attended over 20 events, I can’t remember everyone that is new or an old member, you kind of have to say hello and you would be welcomed to the group.
Over 50 cars at each monthly meeting, about 4 or more different events each month and the amazing number of new friends I have speaks for it’s self in my humble opinion. I have even been invited to other members weddings and night out separately to the main club events.
So sorry you had a bad experience, but I feel you did not give the group a chance and did not put any effort in, because if you had have done you would not have set up fake account just to moan publically when you did not have the decency to contact the AC or any other members of the group, you just attacked a volunteer that puts a lot of their own time and effort into the local club.
I was surprised when I joined the Norfolk Fives last year, there where track day cars, racers, modified beyond belief, rusty MK1’s new MK3’s and now Mk4’s, The mix of cars, people, ages, backgrounds was far beyond what I expected. The runs cater for everyone from Breakfast and Fish and Ship Runs, Walks and Picnics in the countryside, to going down a ski slop on a rubber ring., touring cars, car shows, car rallies, Goodwood Festival of Speed. SO many events to cater for a very diverse group of people. They only things they have in common are that:
We like MX5’s and
They are all a friendly
But that was just my experience in the last year since joining.
Its a shame you feel this way. There is a wide variety of people in the club, and a wide variety of cars. My first meeting was very much the same, a little bit isolated on the edge, didn’t know anyone, but once I got chatting to a couple of people it soon got completely different.
If you come to the next meeting pop over and ask for me (Andy Malcolm - also on FB) and I can introduce you round to some of the others.
snapon38
Hi, Welcome to the weird and wonderful MX5 forum, and I hope, not goodbye. A first experience at an Area meet can be daunting, as you say, there does appear to be a number of cliques that tend to be off-putting to a newcomer. I took a a deep breath, and ventured up to one group who seemed to be about my age and introduced myself as a new member and asked if I could join them.
The conversation wandered far away from cars, and seemed to centre around which holidays, places and restaurants they emjoyed. I said nothing, but then someone engaged me in a conversation and I began to relax.
If no-one does this, then sooner or later you will look for the exit. However, first you have to make an effort, which as a normally shy person I’ve always found difficult - to my cost when meeting a woman I fancied!
There are a few smart alecs who will tell you where the door is if you don’t like what you see the first time, but thankfully they are a small minority who posses little else than a small brain. Ignore them, and persevere! If you read nothing else on this thread than what Cerebus said, then you can’t go amiss, that’s by far the best and most informative post I’ve read from an AC in fourteen years in this club.
Well said my friend.
Personally, I don’t use Facebook (for folks to prove their lives are just as dull as everyone else’s) so I just wonder how you knew instinctively it was a fake account? If people don’t use FB normally but want to be able to see the club page (MX5 or any other) then they would have to set up at least a basic account. The fact that they might then choose not put holiday snaps, selfies and details of what they ate at that new club in town last night (OK yah, totes amazeballs) shouldn’t mean they’re automatically labelled as fake. Maybe in this case it was, then again maybe it wasn’t in which case it doesn’t justify the response described. It’s very easy to jump to conclusions and such actions just add to the feeling of the group being cliquey. A bit more effort needed on both sides, I would humbly suggest.
I was lucky as I went to my 1st meet with an already member (billytheblade) and he introduced me arround…
I have been to EVERY monthly meet since for well over a year… I have made some great new friends by owning an MX5 and feel that you haven’t given the Norfolk Fives a fair trial…
Your 1st meet will be a daunting one BUT you have to make an effort too, you cant expect people to know your even there for the meet if you don’t make your self known…
I would suggest try again and speak to members and make some new friends, or maybe it really isn’t for you…
One think that I wont accept is branding the Norfolk Fives ANYTHING other than a great bunch of people which is an opinion shared by many…