SWMBO is this necessary?

Since joining the MX-5 OC I have received many snippets of help that has made ownership of my MX-5 much easier. Also, where possible I have also tried to help and assist members of the community too.
However, I have noticed that many people on the forum use the term SWMBO. Although I realise that this is mostly used as a term of endearment, much like ‘her in doors’, was used in a popular TV series many moons ago, I find the terminology very generic and borderline insulting.
I know I am also guilty of sometimes using similar language and try and take my time and think. Maybe next time you start typing SWMBO you just think would my wife/partner like this phrase, is this respectful.
Would another way maybe be to mention your wife’s/partners name and personality.
Theo

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You should hear what mine calls me ! :grin:

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I refer to my Long Haired One :wink: as the Mem Sahib in private on a regular basis.
She knows what it means, and just cackles…as she has a very good sense of humour.
I’m The Butler/ Go-ffer/ Mr Fixit allegedly. Do I care?
What I know is we laugh like drains around the house calling each other everything under the sun and have done since around 1976.
As far as I know, a common southern reference to the “Her Indoors” is The Doris.
Perhaps (?) you are hanging on a bit too tight to this howling tsunami of global PC-ness.
My Wife’s name is Jennifer, and TBH matey she’d likely suggest in (cough) candid terms you lighten up and let people be what they want to be with each other.

I have a feeling this thread may not last too long either!!!

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So what’s wrong with shortening “She’s Wonderful My Beautiful One” to SWMBO ? Can’t understand what you’re going on about frankly.

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My first car was called Doris

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Lesbian two-pennethworth here, I’ve called my exes much worse! :joy: I wouldn’t worry- not all women are ‘me too’ obsessed. Many of us even have a sense of humour!!

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I do find the fact you have to apologise for everything these days pathetic. If that offends, so be it.

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Mine is known as Our peg ! Dosent mind lol

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Just read out the posters message to my SWMBO, she shrugged her shoulders and just cringed. !!!.

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Is it insulting you? or are you being offended on the behalf of others?

If it’s the latter then you are implying that they are unable to defend themselves, which is probably just as bad as using the term you dislike in the first place. Surely how we relate to our significant others is entirely our own business.

If it’s the former then I think that might just be a bit weird :slight_smile:

With regard to large purchases, which is usually when this term appears on this forum, I find the term ‘she who must be obeyed’ is entirely true. There’s no way in hell I’m getting those coil overs I want without her express permission.

As for using her name, I generally don’t use my own name online so I certainly won’t be putting hers online

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You only see it on Internet forums. Never heard it in a pub tbh. It was mildly funny about 10 years ago but now just a bit ‘whatever mate’

The wife or her in doors is sufficient i reckon :wink:

As for being offensive? Nah, I can’t see it.

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I did the same, I won’t put what she replied.
And I was trying to stay stum in this thread, I guess I haven’t.

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We are both enjoying working through the box set of Rumpole where the magic acronym is mentioned at least once an episode.

My better half knows she is the boss, and while she continues to think that she is happy, and so am I, for then it is a quiet life with harmony and light, aided by top down motoring in the sunshine.

I sometimes remind her the Niseko was her idea… She might have forgotten about an SLK by now…

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Mem Sahib ( who spent all day in her summer house supplied with tea & scones on ruddy demand by walkie talkie) just been informed it’s time for me to get Kitchin’ beatchin’ as usual.
I’m just used and abused here I tell ya.
Flippin’ SWMBOs eh?

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This place is straight laced enough without any further decent into snowflake territory.

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You can also choose not to be offended, it is easier to change yourself than try to change others.

Personally I find it a term of affection and recognition of the real source of power in the household.

Interesting fact on the origin of the phrase, from a novel published in 1886:

The phrase She Who Must Be Obeyed originally derives from the lead character of Henry Rider Haggard’s 1886 novel She: A History of Adventure .

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Because they’d likely think you’ve erred in some serious way are employing truly major upsucking.
Ya canny win!

I am surprised at the thread to be honest - very little gets to me - I can shrug most things off and very rarely get wound up about comments.

If you look at it as a statement of fact - which in many cases it is, then it is not derisory or anything like that, it just states the importance of our (female) partners, ho we all know are really in charge. The most we can hope for is the power of veto (sometimes!!).

My suggestion is (especially looking at the replies) is that you try not to take it to heart - it is unlikely that its use will change…

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…oh dear…it’s started…and on one of my favourite forums… :frowning:

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Hardly insulting, is it? I might just not be woke enough. “My wife” sounds a bit possessive and subordinating, although it isn’t. “The woman whose husband I am”?

Not everybody is married anyway. Not all are male, and/or partnered with a woman of course. I’ve never really liked “my partner” because of its business connotation, and “my life partner” sounds a bit pomposo.

The possibilities for giving, or taking, offence are endless.

I variously refer to a certain person as “herself”, “the boss”, or “my boon companion”. Is that bad?

Most of these drolleries are harmless, they come and go. Remember “her indoors”? I probably wouldn’t use it myself, although I doubt if the boss would be put out if I did.

EDIT: I have just enquired of my boon companion whether she thinks SWMBO is offensive or not. She said “No”. When pressed as to what she did think, she said it was probably a term of endearment. So there we are. And she’s a member of the provisional wing of the WI.

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